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Feb 4, 2013

Find the Good

I'm starting up yoga again tonight. Can I tell you how excited I am about that? I am beyond ridiculously excited. I am so excited, that I feel like I could throw up from the excitement.

zen chakra monsters with happy buddha by knot by gran'ma
zen chakra monsters with happy buddha by knot by gran'ma
That being said, I saw a movie that I can't stop thinking about. It was The Silver Linings Playbook. Aside from being a wonderful story with great acting that made me happy and sad... it was a very accurate (to me... maybe you would disagree) portrayal of someone going through life after a bipolar diagnosis.

In this sense, the movie made me very uncomfortable. I am living the same thing (and I hate it still). It's hard to watch things on a screen (or read in a book, which is another post) that are painful, but are also things you know have happened in your very recent history. I think I stopped breathing a few times through the movie, but then something charmingly funny would happen... laughing forces you to breathe, apparently. Hubs kept checking on me (discreetly, but I know him after all these years) and gave my hand a squeeze once in a while. This movie was recommended to me, and I knew I had to make the effort to see it. I'd recommend it for anyone who wants to see a good movie. I am additionally recommending it for those of us (and our families) trying to embrace the realities and hardships of being bipolar.

yoga pug?
yoga pug?
So... What does this have to do with yoga? Well, everything. Yoga is healing for me and my silver lining (corny, yes... but totally true). You can always find the good. You just have to look really really hard sometimes. Yoga, for me, is a way to quiet down the CONSTANT whirling of my brain. Yoga reminds me to breathe, without me having to think about it. Yoga is a tool to take back my life, feel good about myself, and figure out what I'm supposed to be doing here on this big spinning ball. It also lets me keep things settled for the times I need to crochet.

Yoga is very important for my crochet career. I'll be stuck forever if I don't commit to changing my life with a daily practice. This is a wonderful start.

If you are interested in purchasing your own set of Zen Chakra Monsters, they are available on: 
The Knot By Gran'ma Website -
Etsy -


  1. What a wonderful, honest post! I admire you for going in this direction with your's something I've wanted to do but my extreme introvert side is very resistant. I have a chronic illness and Yoga plays a similar role in my life. It's my healing, safe, nurturing space and I know I would be lost without it.

    1. Thank you. Apparently I need to use my blog here as one of my other tools to keep it together. LOL. I am hoping that these posts will not leaving me feeling like I'm going to throw up every time I hit publish... eventually. :)

  2. You are a courageous, funny, thoughtful, lovely woman, Jess, and your honesty will be a balm to others, as well as helping you stay on course. I agree that yoga is a great discipline/practice to help with many physical, emotional difficulties we experience. I wouldn't want to give it up.

  3. This post is very moving Jess, I really appreciate your honesty. I absolutely love yoga and swear by it. I use to practice it regularly and take several classes a week a few years ago. Then life kinda flipped upside down for me and I never quite recovered. I miss it like an old friend and when I try to start up a practice on my own it just feels so awkward. Good luck with your own practice.

  4. Jess, I so need a new beginning! Last night I was so tired. Of everything. And feeling bad because the Lord knows that there are so many who have worse things to deal with. A 9 year old we know died of kidney failure due to extended bouts with cancer. All of our grandchildren 17 of them are doing well. And Kyra's mom has to bury her. So a low time. Today, I've read your blog and pray to get a new start going for me. Thank you!

  5. You guys are making me tear up! I hope we can all experience life I guess, the way it should be experienced... by actually feeling it. The hardest parts is dealing with the painful feelings... Yoga and/or finding that silver lining is helpful on looking at things differently I guess.


Thanks for reading. Please share your thoughts with me. I love reading them!