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Mar 14, 2013

Stop Comparing Yourself To Everyone... A Note to Myself

Ask me if I am the jealous type. Go ahead. I will most likely tell you no, I am not the jealous type. I am also a big, fat, liar. I am so jealous. I don't mean to harbor jealousy. It's not the way I want to live life. I strive to admire what others have accomplish, without feeling jealous about not reaching my own dreams, hopes, and desires (*cough*dramallama*cough). The reality of it is, it's really hard not compare yourself to others' success.

Totally unique to me Mini Monster by Knot By Gran'ma
Totally unique to me Mini Monster 
Go look at Fresh Stitches and Crochet Concupiscence. Dooooo it. I'll wait. These 2 have been on my jealousy watch radar for quite a while now. Fresh Stitches has amazing crochet patterns, books, the blog, videos, and everything. Amazing. Crochet Concupiscence has been a constant blip in my brain since the book, Crochet Saved My Life came out. While I'm not dealing with *just* depression, it's hit that "aha!" spot, and I'm currently reading it as part of my understanding-this-crappy-illness regiment. (I just finished An Unquiet Mind, which I loved but also loathed, due to it hitting so close to home. Certain things are incredibly hard to have spelled out right in front of me still. I highly recommend the book.) Anyway. Both of these amazing sites are run by ladies who are incredibly successful. The green eyed monsters (and I still haven't crocheted one of those why?) creeps out, and I lament over wonder why I'm not as successful as they are.

Simple. We recently discussed why it's hard to even keep my head above water creatively. This is enough reasoning for me, but there's more.

  • I do not do the same work as anyone else. My work is unique to me, as others' is unique to them. This is what being an artist is.
  • My life is different than anyone I know. It's okay, and it will change continuously over my lifetime. All I have to do is strive to live happy and healthy with my family.
  • I don't necessarily have the same drive or organizational skills to handle the same types of workload. This is part of my personality, and I need to embrace it as super swell.
  • All I can do is the best job that I can do. I get to work from home. It's something I want to do, and what other people do with their day really shouldn't impact mine. Life is short, so worrying about things I cannot control is dumb.
  • It's not my business what anyone else might think of my success or lack thereof. (I stole that from Facebook, but changed it to be awesome...and have the word "thereof" in it.)
I need to start walking my own walk... 'cause I'm talking a good talk.


  1. Another awesome post! I needed to read this today, your second point in particular. I have a chronic illness and am constantly feeling the green eyed monster hanging about in my house. Time to push that bugger out the door and get on with it!

    1. This post has been a half-hearted mantra lately. Getting it out and getting on with following my own advice. I'm trying to let go of certain things that add unnecessary stress. Jealousy is first to go, because it really shouldn't even be an issue in the first place.

  2. Hello there! I just found you from the totally awesome blog hop. While reading your words, I saw myself. I can relate in so much. Thanks for the second part of your post...I'll have to keep that in mind!

    Krysta from

  3. Another insightful, transparent post Jess! Thank you...:)

  4. Jess, you are amazing. Your work is truly unique and incredible. I found you after you commented on Gypsy in Jasper and my mouth DROPPED when I went to your shop. Your crocheted creatures are too cool. (And I'm buying that aviator hat pattern ASAP. My bf NEEDS one of those.)

    In the world of the internet, comparing your accomplishments to others is easier than ever. In the old days, you could only compare to the people within your own area and now you have to compare to the entire world. It sucks and it's incredibly hard. I deal with it constantly myself and I do my DARNDEST to keep that green-eyed monster at bay, but sometimes it's just impossible.

    I think it helps to write these things out and to have a list like you made stating why it's OK to feel jealous and why you don't need to be jealous — why it's OK to be you and to be where you are.



Thanks for reading. Please share your thoughts with me. I love reading them!